There was a cruise ship going through some rough waters that ended up sinking just off the coast of a small deserted island. There were only 3 survivors: 2 guys and a girl. 

They lived there for a couple of years doing what was natural for men and women. After several years of casual sex all the time, the girl felt really bad about what she had been doing. She felt having sex with both guys was so bad that she killed herself.

It was very tragic but the two guys managed to get through it and after a while nature once more took it's inevitable course. Well, a couple more years went by and the guys began to feel absolutely horrible about what they were doing, so they buried her.

Classic Olympic line.....

Event - Women's Weightlifting (clean and jerk)

David Vine - "And here's the favourite for the title. I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing".

A man takes his wife to the Adelaide show. They start heading down the alley that houses all the bulls. The sign on the first bull's stall states:

"This bull mated 50 times last year." The wife turns to her husband and says, "He mated 50 times in a year, isn't that nice!."

They proceed to the next bull and his sign stated: "This bull mated 65 times last year." The wife turns to her husband and says, "This one mated 65 times last year. That is over 5 times a month. You could learn from this one!"

They proceeded to the last bull and his sign said: "This bull mated 365 times last year." The wife's mouth drops open and says, "WOW! He mated 365 times last year. That is ONCE A DAY!!! You could really learn from this one."

The fed up man turns to his wife and says, "Go up and inquire if he had to f~~~ the same cow every day."